Easter Sunday, April 12, 2020 - Gratitude



It was overcast today but I woke up feeling really grateful. I know it's Easter, and not Thanksgiving, but I just feel grateful to be alive every day right now.


Despite the need for physical distance during this time, doesn't it feel like we're closer than we've ever been? I've spoken to more relatives, more often than I ever have in my adult life. It's almost as if all of the judgement and anger we had, has melted away.


But I have no doubt this pandemic had to happen.


We became too busy, too worried, too spiteful, too greedy, too tangled up in what we have. We lusted for money, power and all that comes with those. And we were bitter, angry and stressed out because we didn't have them.


We convinced ourselves we didn't have enough. We convinced ourselves we weren't good enough. We invited shame into our lives because shame comes when we put our worth in the eyes of others.


We numbed, we ran, we pushed down anything real, anything vulnerable or 'weak'. Exposing ourselves as flawed humans wasn't part of the playbook. In our wireless world, it made us all disconnected.


And just as the walls began to close in around us, isolating us from one another, the physical separation of this pandemic is what ultimately brings us back together.


But there are so many questions.


What will happen to the economy?


What will happen to inflated incomes? What will happen to wealth? What will happen to the wealthy?


What happens if hierarchy disappears?


The coronavirus doesn't discriminate. Some people recover and some people die.


And what about the people who are taking care of us; health care workers? They take the place of the soldiers in any war of yesterday. This has taken its toll on them. Many of us are so grateful for their service but will we treat them like we treat our veterans when, and if, we 'flatten the curve'?


We're living one day to the next. Policies change, businesses close, reassurances are made but what do we really know for sure?


Humans are luminous, resilient beings; full of love and light. It's who we are at our essence. Thankfully the skins and the scales are falling away. We're stepping out of who we think we should be and stepping into who we are destined to be.


I feel like I've been awakened and I know others feel the same.


I'm not sure I've ever loved the sweet melody the birds sing in the morning as much as I do now. I haven't baked this much from scratch in close to 20 years. I cry at the drop of a hat and I have no shame. It's okay. Every emotion is just, okay. I'm having as much empathy for myself as I would have for another.


We all just have to take it one day at time. Every day is a gift.


I'm just grateful to still be along for the ride.











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© 2019 Shauna M Rae